Passion

Put your whole heart into it.

One of my favorite verses from the Old Testament was in this Sunday's morning prayer. It's from Ezekiel, 36:25-28. It goes as follows from the Revised Standard Version:

"I will sprinkle clean water upon you, and you shall be clean from all your uncleannesses, and from all your idols I will cleanse you.
A new heart I will give you, and a new spirit I will put within you; and I will take out of your flesh the heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.
And I will put my spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statutes and be careful to observe my ordinances.
You shall dwell in the land which I gave to your fathers; and you shall be my people, and I will be your God."

The Lord informs us we don't have to do much work to learn how to love. He plans on doing the hard part for us. The New American Bible's version reads, "taking from your bodies your stony hearts and giving you natural hearts." This is how we were meant to live, how we were meant to love. With hearts that are real, enflamed with his Spirit and alive in his mercy.

For God to love us is for God to exist. For us to love him in return, and to love others as he teaches us to love them, is for us to receive another great gift from him; a gift of a new heart, a heart that is not afraid.

The Scripture passage that sunk in for me today as we celebrate our Nation's Independence was Galatians 5:1, "For freedom Christ set us free; so stand firm and do not submit again to the yoke of slavery." We cannot dwell in fear for one so great as the Son of God himself freely chose to lay down his life on our behalf and to pay the ransom for our sins, that we might be able to walk in his light and receive the gift of salvation.

But we cannot falter when we look upon the gift! It must not blind us with its light, or startle us with its greatness, to the point that we would not want to receive it! We might feel unworthy, and rightly so, for we are. Yet, he has made us worthy. So we cannot push it away, or deny the gift he seeks to give us!

Today in mass I noticed the mother in front of me cover her sons shoulders with her cardigan (it was rather cold in the church). The little boy shrugged it off and looked at her as if to say, "Mom, really?" I know we all get frustrated with loving gestures our moms try to show, but what came to mind after observing this was how often the Lord attempts to love us in just the same way, and how often we too shrug off his gifts and say, "not now" or "it's a little embarrassing right now, God."

He wants us to have hearts that are open to receive. How else can we live? How can we have the hope of growth or change or goodness or virtues or perseverance or victory if we can't open our hearts to love? This beautiful quote was in one of my favorite books of all time, "I Believe in Love." I'm paraphrasing, but it read something like "A holy nun once said to St. Francis de Sales that she wished to learn love through humility. St. Francis replied that he wished to learn humility through love." I found this so striking because it is absolutely humbling when you realize someone loves you, truly. You know your flaws, your failures, how selfish or impatient you can be. You recognize that you don't always have it together and perhaps you never will. Yet, they love you. They choose to love you. They continue to choose to love you day after day, for who you are now, not who you'll be or who you've been. They sincerely appreciate the heart, soul and mind that dwell together in the person that is you. They wouldn't want you any other way. Why? It seems ridiculous. Love is ridiculous. Of course it should humble us. It absolutely should leave us completely dumbstruck, flabbergasted, maybe even spellbound. Ludicrous. It is ludicrous that any heart can fully and freely give itself over to anything another might bring... beauty and pain, joy and sadness, and the greatest risk of abuse or abandonment... while simultaneously the greatest risk of perfect and ever-present fully returned love.

To enter into this, we need rejuvenation. Often. We cannot help but build up defenses. Walls keep the pain out and help us to manage how we encounter life. Yet, these things can greatly hinder us from receiving and giving, and they aren't meant to last. Sometimes they are good or necessary as we work on healing, but the Lord invites us constantly to new freedom, new wholeness, new love; and with that, he offers us new hearts.

So let us learn how to accept from Jesus' hand the heart he offers us, so that in turn we can passionately live this life, fully giving and fully receiving, because our stony hearts have been cast off and our natural hearts are beating fast.